Beautiful, beautiful! “Hello Lady, where are you from? And not unusually: I love you! For most female first-time visitors to Cuba, all the male attention, comes as something of a shock. Some get scared (usually the American women), some get acutely embarrassed (usually us Scandinavians) and some angry (usually the Swiss and German).

Que linda! Tienes ojos muy bonitos! Hola ruvia! If you speak Spanish, you will probably feel more on top of the situation. At least you understand what is being said to you.
Arguably, the reactions of female visitors have less to do with language skills and more to do with coming from cultures where we do not even acknowledge each other’s presence in the public domain, let alone pay compliments to strangers. How then can we understand and enjoy this part of the Cuban culture?

…….so you see, the leap from ordinary , daily communication to outright flirting, is not that big.

While in Cuba try to think of flirting as part of the bigger picture. The bigger picture being that engaging in conversation with complete strangers is perfectly normal. If you are walking with a child, strangers will stop and coo and say que bonito on every corner, quite a few will also want to pick up the baby. Behaviour that would be cause for alarm in many countries, but not in Cuba.

In Cuba we also ask complete strangers where they bought their eggs or their toilet paper. If you go to the market to buy some tomatoes, you will find yourself being called mi vida or mi amor by the woman serving you. Standing in line somewhere, strangers discuss the latest telenovela with whoever is standing next to them.  In social settings with friends or family, compliments abound. What a nice dress, how handsome, you are looking good, how lovely that perfume etc. All given freely and with great enthusiasm.

So you see? In Cuba, the leap from ordinary, daily communication to outright flirting is not such a big leap at all. It is just developing on something that is already there.
The difference between grosero (lewd comments meant to embarass) and piropos (cute comments meant to charm) is an important distinction. Unfortunately, this distinction might mean little to a Northern European whose definition of normal behaviour is to pretend that other people do not exist. But try! It has less to do with language skills, and more to do with being able to read eyes and body language. Even if I speak Cuban Spanish, I am still some way from understanding the words of the grosero. Neither do I want to. But I do know if I am being charmed or shamed.

The Cuban women too are recipients of a big share of the attention. Admittedly, she does not have to listen to the tiresome hello lady where are you from all day. The piropos will be far more creative. The Cuban women, in stark contrast to us yumas, are never at a loss for words though. She will respond with quick wit and a smile. Or she will just walk on ignoring. If she feels like it she might very well be the first to say something flirtatious to a man in passing too.   Que mango!

So my advice? Relax and enjoy the attention. Smile to who you want, talk to who you want and walk away when you want.  After her return to Norway, a Casa Nini guest wrote on her Facebook: Now I have walked along the Oslo-fjord all the way from Bygdøy to the Opera house –  without being complimented, talked to or looked at even once. What a sad state of affairs indeed!